i felt like a horrible douche today, i mean nobody pointed it out. but still, he was a person. a really nice person who volunteered, to help kids. and i was rude. who the fuck am i to do that to a person? i'm horrible. i just blatantly made fun of him. what if he heard me? oh my god i just am heartless. i shouldn't make fun of people. what if he is insecure about it? 

i should be understanding of that... me of all people. i used to cut myself. maybe he did too. god i'm horrible. i can't... not now.